Quite the drama last night at the Staples Center. Let’s run through the manuscript.
Stadium Entry: Check out new ESPN building and huge HD screen across the street from the Staples Center.
Pregame Intro: Present spectacular hi-def display on giant cylinder draped sheets. (Stand in awe)
First Quarter: Zero energy. Slow start to story. (Yawn)
Second Quarter: Queue supporting actor (Jack Nicholson) entry to courtside right.
Few minutes left in half: Infuse both teams with energy. Dwayne Wade has three straight dunks with Kobe battling back with buckets after each one.
Half Time: Enjoy latest trendy bar within the Staples Center. Order their new mixed drink, “Artest’s Hennesy”.
Third Quarter: Keep score close and build suspense.
Half way through Fourth Quarter: Pau Gasol takes a finger from teammate in the eye and begins writhing in pain and rolling around in pain. Build emotional suspense (crowd stands and worries). Gasol returns to the lineup a few minutes later, thus legitimizing Pao’s acting career.
Two Minutes left in Fourth: Jermaine O’Neal posterizes Lamar Odom and talks trash about the Kardashians with a little shove to boot. Odom must look tough in front of his girl; gives a two-handed shove back. Offsetting technicals. Odom exit court side left.
10 Seconds left, Heat 104-Lakers 100: Queue Leonardo Dicaprio concourse exit to beat the crowd and traffic.
5 Seconds left: Derek Fisher to display seniority and pose with a three to put the Lakers down 1.
3.2 Seconds left: Place Kobe in center stage with ball and let him improv.
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